Oh boy this story is long but I’m going to condense it as best I can!
Basically my OBGYN made me feel uncomfortable and distrustful – she called me crazy. During an appointment she asked what were my plans for pain management during labor and my exact words were “im open to anything but i wanna go as natural as possible”. She looked at me and said “no epidural??” I said if I can do without it, I’d prefer no epidural. She went OFF on a tangent of how it will help and how women are crazy during labor screaming like the exorcist with their heads spinning around. She said I’d be crazy for not using one. I was so shocked I just chuckled nervously and went home.. She tried to persuade me so much that I thought “She wants this for herself.. so she doesn’t have to deal with me yelling or anything.. what kind of doctor does this..” I immediately felt unsafe with her. I felt like during my labor she would make executive decisions about MY baby and MY labor.
From then on I never felt the same & after more debacles concerning a gestational diabetes test (which I ended up testing negative for) I decided to switch practices. After seeing that doctor at least 4 times she never recognized me.. each time she greeted me “nice to meet you” and had no idea who i was. Maybe this is most doctors but either way i didnt like it.
So in my third trimester I found a new OBGYN and moved doctors. Lawd did this end up being WORSE.
A huge thing to note here is that you do not get the same doctor every appointment. They try to make you see each doctor in their practice because you don’t know who will be on call the day you go into labor. So my main doctor I loved at the new practice, I only got to meet with her twice & she did not end up delivering my baby! That ended up being a male doctor who was on call for the hospital, not my practice! What a headspin!
So the worse part I mentioned earlier has to do with one of the other doctors my practice had me meet with. We shall call her Gert (not her real name). Gert I ended up seeing three times total.
The first time I met Gert it was my second appointment at the new practice & she says “By the way there’s a blood test you need to get that’s mandatory”. I told her I thought it was optional because last appointment that’s what they said. She immediately said “No. It’s required by our practice”. So… I’m caught off guard and have been through SO MANY BLOOD TESTS and shots by this point that I’m exhausted and hate being pricked for every little test I’ve never heard of and don’t understand. I asked her if i can get the test next visit and she said fine. I proceeded to call my lawyer to ask if it’s even possible for doctors to require I get blood tests. My lawyer said it is not and I can refuse any medical procedure I want. If it’s “required by their practice” I can ask to see it in writing in the obgyn’s guidance to prove it.
So that is exactly what I did. My next appointment I asked to see this test written in the by-laws and GUESS WHAT. It isn’t! It doesnt exist, this test is not mandated by their practice at all. It’s just recommended. So Gert just loves to exaggerate and pressure me to get tests. Screw her. So obviously I declined the test since it wasn’t mandatory.
The next visit I got Gert AGAIN and she reads on my chart how I declined the test.. whew.. this bitch walks in pissed and doesnt even look at me. She says “Look, I don’t know how we can be your doctor when you are declining treatment for everything”. Everything????? what the fck is everything?! One blood test??? Is everything?? Oh, and god forbid i decline the possibility of an epidural WHICH I NEVER DECLINED! I just said “id prefer”!! So I’m looking at Gert in absolute disbelief… and then I reiterated “I am not refusing an epidural, I’m open to anything that is needed and I just like the idea of a natural birth. I’m not sure that’ll even happen.” She proceeded to ignore me, check my baby bump measurement and then threw the next appointment paper slip at me. Okay, not threw it but she definitely tossed it at me while walking out the door.
I….. have never been so ignored and written off in my life. Literally treated me like I was the most difficult person in the world. Nowhere did she try to explain to me what the blood test was for, why I could need it.. nothing! As soon as you dont follow what Gert suggests, she treats you like dirt.
The third time I saw her was while in labor…… yepp…… the worst possible scenario.. I had been going to my appointments alone because my husband has to work but I told him if we get Gert in delivery I’m asking to get the hospital doctor on call instead of her. I’m almost shaking in labor terrified Gert is going to force me to do something I don’t want or treat my baby badly.
I talked to my nurses who were the sweetest people ever and they reassured me that I’m not far along enough in labor to give birth while on Gert’s shift and that if I really wanted to I can switch doctors. I trusted my nurse’s opinion & just dealth with Gert. Thankfully she only visited twice during her shift and I don’t think she recognized me. She just checked my vitals and broke my water. By the time I gave birth I had the male doctor on his shift so that was nice~
I will write my labor & delivery story soon!
I just wanted to get my thoughts down of my experience and that it’s okay to switch your baby doctor if you dont’ feel comfortable. this is YOUR baby and YOUR life.
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My doctor/nurse never asked me if I want an Epidural but they did inject me with something and inhale the gas through a mask that made me sleepy so that I could bear the pain and deal with my anxiety. I only lose some blood luckily I didn’t die because of that X(
Awww I’m sorry to hear they didn’t ask your consent!!! I actually wanted that treatment but it’s not allowed in my state 🙁